“This is boring . . . or dumb . . . or hard.”
“But I hate doing _________!” (fill in the blank)
“Do I really have to do this? Why do I have to do this?”
Why am I still hearing these complaints thinly disguised as questions? I had always heard them from my children while trying to complete a homework assignment for a class at school. They were definitely not expected after we brought them home last year. I know, silly me. There’s no such thing as a complaint-free 12-year-old boy or 8-year-old girl! I really didn’t expect it to be easy, but I thought ‘school-at-home’ would be different enough to hold their attention and be something we could all enjoy. I didn’t realize that ‘school-at-home’ is not the same as ‘home education’! I was naively looking for a mom (me) and the kids at the kitchen table smiling and laughing over piles of textbooks, worksheets and flash cards. Almost every homeschool advertisement or story I saw during our ‘research phase’ contained pictures showing just that… Is that what homeschool looks like at your house? If it’s anything like the way we started out, ‘school’ at your house looks like a mom and kid(s) at the kitchen table frowning, arguing, and sometimes yelling over textbooks, worksheets and flashcards.
We had started out trapped neck-deep in what I now refer to as “The Kitchen Table Habit”. Although in my heart I think I really knew better, my mind was convinced that my children had to be ‘taught’ everything, or they weren’t learning. I had scheduled, planned and organized them into spending a few hours a day sitting at the table reading, writing and ‘rithmetic-ing. We all hated every minute. I think the highlight of the day was reading curled up on the couch in the living room or stretched out on the floor. No one was having much fun.
Over the previous summer I had down-loaded a free unit study based on fall leaves that was just sitting on my computer. I stumbled across it one day in October, and my mind finally realized what my heart had known all along. I quickly changed our planning calendar, dropped everything we were doing, and began this unit. It included literature, writing, math, earth science, chemistry, spelling, geography, vocabulary, art, hiking, computer knowledge, and probably a million other things I can’t remember!
- We went to our local park twice; once to collect different leaves, and once to count and estimate the number of leaves per branch. That information was then used to guess which types of trees carried the most leaves, and which environment was more leaf-producing; a closely packed woods or a carefully landscaped park.
- The children used the computer and some library books to identify the trees in the park by the leaf shape and created a scrapbook of the identified leaves.
- We used a map to find the peak color-change times in our country and in the process learned the location of all 50 states.
- There was an entire day spent studying photosynthesis, leaching the color out of the leaves with rubbing alcohol and coffee filters, learning which leaves contained which chemicals.
- I found a locally produced video at the library about autumn in the Smoky Mountains.
- We looked at tree rings, seeds, bark, and anything else the kids wanted to study.
- We made some stained glass leaves with wax paper, crayon shavings and an iron, read and wrote poetry about autumn, and had a lot of fun!
Ok, so what’s the lesson here? Well, there are actually a few lessons.
- I learned that I already knew these lessons, I had just forgotten them. Children (and adults) learn best by doing. I had read about these things, but since we hadn’t practiced them, I didn’t remember.
- I learned that I don’t have to know everything; I can learn right along with the kids. I should learn right along with the kids. I think that’s how it’s supposed to work. We share with our children a life-long love of learning by learning all along our life, right?
- I discovered (or remembered) that ‘learning’ and ‘school’ aren’t necessarily synonymous. We had been 'doing school’ in our dining room, and I was the ‘teacher’. What fun is that? How much did they retain from that experience? Learning takes place every day, every where. It’s our job as ‘learning facilitators’ to provide the learning opportunities. Then the children learn. It’s what they do.
- Last (or not last - I’m still learning), I learned that ‘kitchen table lessons’ in my house elicit a groan from both my kids, and it’s best just to avoid them. If we have to read something together, we just do it on the couches in the living room. I’ve forgiven their penmanship on most things to allow them to spread out on the floor. They type all of their final drafts on the computer, anyway, so the handwriting is irrelevant. Vocab with Dad “class” is even conducted across the bed in the master bedroom! We take field trips, we learn in the car, we watch videos, we play games. We do many things that don’t involve the kitchen table. We do, however, eat dinner together at that table and have discussions about all sorts of subjects. Sometimes the kids learn things, and sometimes they teach us. But very rarely do we use the table for ‘school’.
- First, you could ask your kids what they want to learn. What topic, place or person has always interested them, but they’ve never been able to get enough information on? This may take a little prodding and some investigative questions on your part, but it’s worth it! After you know what they want to learn, allow them to do it. Don’t teach them; provide them with the tools to find their own materials. Help the little ones search the library or the internet, and guide the older children toward age-appropriate books and reputable websites, and let them go. But don’t use the table. Allow them to learn where they’re comfortable. If you go this route, you should also allow them to decide how they will show what they’ve learned. They could make their own newspaper, website, presentation board, play, commercial, video; the possibilities are endless. But don’t use the table, unless there is something involved that could choke a small child or family pet, of course. The older children could help the younger ones. My son is currently ‘teaching’ 4th-grade-level science to his sister while learning 8th-grade level science. All because he loves to show off what he knows to her, and she loves to ask questions to try to trip him up!
- Another option is to take what you’re already studying and find some opportunities to shake things up a bit. Ask your children how they would like to change things. Maybe they’d like to move to the couch or the floor, or even the porch or yard. Perhaps instead of completing a math worksheet every day (or in addition to it), you could play a board game involving money and keep it going the entire week. Find a local field trip to enhance something you’re currently learning. Read a play or novel out loud and let them act it out. Find an ‘educational’ video at the library. Create a relevant craft. Cook dinner together using fractions. But do not use the table. Again, the possibilities are endless, and something you can do even if you use a packaged or on-line curriculum.
